I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.

Henny Youngman
Some Similar Quotes
  1. Who are you? Are you in touch with all of your darkest fantasies? Have you created a life for yourself where you can experience them? I have. I am fucking crazy. But I am free. - Lana Del Rey

  2. Life is hell, at some point we all just have to get used to it. - Alysha Speer

  3. Thank you for being you, because without whom, I wouldn't be me. - Anthony T Hincks

  4. It's time to fly. Care to join me? - Anthony T. Hincks

  5. You can't be me and I can't be you, so I guess that means we'll have to be ourselves. - Anthony T. Hincks

More Quotes By Henny Youngman
  1. Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.

  2. When you battle with your conscience and lose, you win. -Henny Youngman, comedian and violinist (1906-1998)

  3. You can't buy love but you can pay heavily for it.

  4. The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

  5. I wanted to become an atheist but I gave it up. They have no holidays.

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